If a guy tells
me he has a problem, what should I do? Should I tell someone?
Holding a secret
like someone else’s pornography addiction on your own can be pretty
overwhelming. However, if you want to keep this friend/boyfriend around
in your life, it’s important that you maintain confidentiality. It will
be helpful if you encourage them to talk with their bishop and attend addiction
recovery groups and counseling. It will also be helpful for you to set up
some boundaries with them so they don’t end up using you as their counselor.
Asking them to please talk to their bishop, counselor or support group
about it and letting them know you are there to support them and help them get
the help that they need, but that you can’t take the burden away from them in
the same way a bishop or therapist can. You also need to remember that
you can’t fix their problem. You can encourage them and love them and
support them, but they are accountable to their own choices and you can only
make choices for yourself.
It might be helpful for you also to go to a counselor, bishop or
support group yourself as to not have to carry the burden of someone else’s
struggle on your own. Talking to a bishop, counselor or support group is
not breaking the trust of the person who told you, as long as you refrain from
using names and identifying features.
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